I’m at the mid-week point of my MFA residency at Queens University in Charlotte, NC and I am loving it! It is so strange to be by myself. I’ve been married for 9 years and a mother for almost 7 and so I really haven’t been on my own for almost 10 years! It’s such a strange feeling. It was really hard to leave my boys, I got all choked up and had to walk quickly away from mom’s car without looking back at their faces in the backseat of the car because I was trying to hold it all together. I have that persistent resistance to crying, to loosing control which I know relates to both diabetes and my family-of-origin’s, “there’s always someone worse off than you” attitude. I was thinking at the time that I was trying to be strong for the boys, to make it easier for them to leave me without seeing me cry….but would it have been so terrible if they had seen me cry? Hmmm….
So leaving felt like being pushed off the high-dive. And here I am, learning to swim and it’s wonderful. The program here is great. I’m doing exactly what I love to do. I’m spending all day learning about writers, writing critiques and workshopping other students writings. It’s a lot of work, I’m kind of stunned with how much work I’m doing…..but it’s good work. It’s hard-good work. And the faculty is amazing, I love James McKean who will be my instructor for the fall semester and I got to meet Elizabeth “Liz” Strout and told her what a big fan I am and I’ll be in a workshop with Robert Polito, the director of the New School, this afternoon who is brilliant. It goes on and on…….
Later, when I get home again, I’ll post some photos of the dorm I am living in…..it’s like being a freshman in college all over again!